Sunday, October 17, 2010

THP closes US129 for 6 months after deadly crash



THE DRAGONATER WINS IN TRAFFIC COURT AT DEALS GAP, RAISES SPEED LIMIT TO 65 MPH ON THE DRAGON - NOLLE PROSEQUI BY BLOUNT COUNTY ATTORNEY GENERAL. NO TESTIMONY, HEARING NOR TRIAL WHATSOEVER. 60 MPH SPEEDING TICKET DISMISSED WITH PREJUDICE, COSTS PAID BY THE STATE, IN BLOUNT COUNTY GENERAL SESSIONS COURT WITH JUDGE BREWER. THP TROOPER RANDALL HUCKEBY ADMITTED ON VIDEOTAPE DURING TRAFFIC STOP THAT ALL SPEEDING TICKETS NORTHBOUND ON US129 AT MILE MARKER 0.5 ARE FEDERAL JURISDICTION, NOT STATE JURISDICTION (VIDEO BY THE DRAGONATER). HUCKEBY WAS ALSO CAUGHT ON VIDEO SPEEDING AT 60 MPH ON THE DRAGON, WITHOUT THE MANDATORY EMERGENCY LIGHTS AND SIREN REQUIRED FOR IMMUNITY FROM PROSECUTION (VIDEO BY THE DRAGONATER). TDOT ADMITTED IN WRITING THAT THE MANDATORY TRAFFIC ENGINEERING SURVEY SPEED AUDIT WAS NEVER PERFORMED, IN VIOLATION OF TN CODE, THUS THE POSTED 30 MPH SPEED LIMIT ON THE DRAGON REVERTS TO THE DEFAULT 65 MPH IN TN CODE. THE DRAGONATER ALSO MADE VIDEO OF TROOPER HUCKEBY SPEEDING UP TO 60 MPH ON THE DRAGON IN A 30 MPH ZONE, WITHOUT MANDATORY EMERGENCY LIGHTS NOR SIREN, IN VIOLATION OF TN CODE, AND PERJURY IN HIS PERSONNEL FILE, WHICH SHOWED HIS $100,000+ SALARY. 2007 TDOT SAFETY AUDIT REPORT CONFESSED THAT THP'S JOB IS TO BAN ALL COMMERCIAL BUSINESSES ON THE DRAGON, SO THP TICKETS INCREASED 11,400% IN BLOUNT COUNTY. THP'S STALKER RADAR OPERATOR MANUAL CONFESSED THAT RADAR CANNOT MEASURE THE SPEED OF VEHICLES WITHIN 18 MPH OF ACTUAL SPEED. WATCH THIS SPACE FOR FULL EVIDENCE FILE. UPDATE 7 MARCH 2011

Deadly car wreck on Ill Killya Highway

by John Swinton
WAAR TV

ALCOA, TENN. - A three-car intentional accident left one Knoxville woman dead.

"Another career criminal bites the dust," said Capt. Dick Masterbaiter of the Tennessee Highway Patrol. "No sane person drives on US129 unless they're a Renegade with a deathwish."

It happened on Ill Killya Highway just 32 miles from the Dragon on Saturday.

Alcoa police officers said the criminal car driver, speeding at 25 mph above the new 30 mph limit, was killed as the result of the obviously premeditated accident.

Another criminal car driver, aged 41 from Knoxville, was speeding at 35 mph northbound when he started merging into the right lane.

The criminal's Kidnappyvan sideswiped a speeding car being driven by a third criminal, which caused her to veer off the road.

The second criminal then hit the first criminal's Japsubishi Ricaroni, which had just stopped speeding and was parked at a new red-light camera on the Carl Koella Kill A Biker Get A Memorial Highway. The dead criminal was pronounced dead at the scene of the crime spree.

After a four hour rescue, the deceased criminal was taken by Rural Metro Taxi Service to Blount Memorial Death Camp, where the corpse was butchered for $500,000 in body parts. Dr. Frank N. Fartir, head of the Obamacare Emergency Organ Harvest Unit, said, "It's an early Christmas this year. I'll be able to buy that 100-foot SeaRay after all."

APD cited the surviving criminals for "speeding," "failing to maintain lane" and "habitual motor offender". THP cited the deceased criminal with "illegal parking" at a red light.

"The third criminal and his criminal passenger suffered no injuries, unfortunately, so I won't get any more overtime," said Capt. Masterbaiter. "How the Hell am I going to pay three alimony checks? That 700-ticket quota don't cut it."

The second and third criminals, and the criminal passenger, were wearing crash belts, to aid and abet their speeding. The dead criminal was not wearing a crash belt, or it disconnected upon impact. "Good riddance," said Capt. Masterbaiter. "That's one less scumbag to arrest for the crime of driving. We never investigate defective vehicle design. That's above our I.Q. test scores."

Redflex refused to release photos of the crash scene, citing the Tennessee Reporters Shield Law and the Australian Constitution. "Thanks to our cameras, crashes have been reduced, capish," said Guido Gotti, vice president of Offshore Protection Services.

The investigation is ongoing into banning all car drivers in Tennessee. "Everybody knows cars are dangerous, and only criminals drive cars. Therefore we closed Ill Killya Highway for your own damn good," said Governor Don H. M. O. Whormedisin, while boarding his private jet on his fifth vacation paid by Redflex this year.


Contact John Swinton at slayerhater@waartv.com

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