State Trooper Christmas Wish

CHRISTMAS FAMILY DIARY 2013: FEMA CAMP #291

By Trooper Greg Evensen, Kansas State Police
NewsWithViews.com
December 11, 2012

We had no choice, really. The weather this year has been exceptionally odd with cold spells and drought. Raising a garden was unsuccessful and feeding the livestock almost impossible as hay bales were nearly $15 each. Our cash reserves, which we thought we had plenty of, were down to just enough to pay property taxes with dollars worth nothing on land worth nothing and hardly any income left to save anyway. What electricity was available you could not afford and gasoline was just under $10 per gallon. Family trips and shopping malls were both nearing extinction.

What really angered me the most though, were those “patriots,” sanctimonious Christians, and so called “preppers” that were quiet now that most people blamed then for the unstable government and the sudden shut off of government checks and commodities. Most state governments had nothing left, and the feds were holed up in guarded retreats conducting endless meetings on how to deal with the panic.

In looking back, I should have been a bit more up with what was going on. The job, kid’s sports, and trips to the casino were so much fun and you know, got my mind off all of the bad news. We used to cook out, but the UN Agenda 21 agreements at the county level had pretty much done away with that. Cops were on “sniff” patrol driving slowly through streets looking for old timers who would just not obey the law. They said city hall and the state had everything under control as things heated up, but then it seemed that the constant road blocks, checks for weapons and “terrorists” kept you from being able to get things done on schedule. I mean, you just couldn’t let people run around with guns in their trunks and just inside the door of their homes for God’s sake! What with break-ins so common, think of all those dangerous types with even more guns that the defense nut thought he had to have.

So when the cops got their “final authority” through that UN gun treaty, we finally thought that the insanity with guns would be over. They came on TV and said there were places you could turn them in and you would get two full cases of MRE meals that would last TWO WEEKS! Lines at the cop shop were long and it was cold, but it was worth it for sure to get rid of a gun and get food. Besides, the really over the edge crowd that hung on to their guns didn’t have any ammunition for them anyway. The plants had been told to stop supplying sporting goods stores and all ammo was being shipped to government storage facilities for safety reasons anyway.

Things got really tough though when we decided to start stocking up when we went to the grocery store. $5 a can tuna and $4 a box for mac and cheese were beyond our reach. So, we grabbed a few packs of GMO vegetable seeds and felt like we could really do better feeding our families naturally with good stuff anyway.

Over the months since the horrific war in Syria and Israel, nothing seemed to go well, and the president just kept assuring the public that as quickly as the fighting was under control, the government would divert money and resources back to the states for relief. With the loss of 25,000 sailors and airmen during the surprise Iranian attack on our aircraft carrier task force, many of our most advanced fighters ran into flight problems with systems failures caused by imported flight system computer chips. The marines were left to fight on with no air cover to speak of and for the first time, hundreds of our troops were captured when the Pentagon would not “risk” any more losses in trying to assist those on the ground. One general was shot by security forces assigned to him when he told the Pentagon to “go to hell” and had units ready to send in for a breakout attempt. One military man from our area who returned said it was utter chaos. No one seemed to know what was going on or what to do. Confusion reined. He said if Russia began an offensive, it was over for the US unless it went nuclear. If we had to, nuclear weapons seemed to be a safety net for us.

Our daughter was REALLY sick that fall and we had no pharmaceuticals left. They had just started a program where you had to take a government issued “smart” card to be able to pick up anything that needed a prescription. This was going to expand to just about everything else as well, so we decided right then and there that it was time to stock up a bit more. An “underground” trading system using real silver and some gold for big things was getting to be fairly common. It was a lot easier to swap some things than go through four forms just to get a shovel. You see, shovels were classified as dangerous weapons now since a few home invaders had been killed by residents who tried to defend their homes when that UN gun bill was signed, and the BATFE was checking shovel sales against a list of domestic terrorists which now included highway workers, farmers, and gardeners.

A spade was in the same category as an “assault weapon.” You could be shot on sight for carrying a spade in a school zone or restricted urban neighborhood. You can see why raising a garden has become so difficult and frankly hardly worth it.

One of the most egregious issues though was those damn goats, horses, cows and pets. The loud mouths who insisted on their “right” to raise animals without RFID chips had risked us all with the high probability of disease spreading, since those rogue farmers would not inoculate their stock with the government’s required—and entirely understandable--- mandate to prove all tagged animals had received the 19 injections against any virus that could infect the population. We really wanted clean, safe meat to eat. Some farmers were actually imprisoned and a few died resisting this effort to stabilize the economy and for the USDA to do its job. I just don’t understand that kind of stupidity.

Just before the whole thing kind of unraveled, we realized that maybe we should try to seek some spiritual insight and participate with others who felt the same way. My wife had a couple of friends who convinced us to join them and so we did. Two former regular church types, a priest, a rabbi and some other “different” alternative gay fellowship guy had a natural service in the woods where everyone could come dressed or undressed and express their thanks to each other for the closeness they felt to their friends and the relationship they craved with the trees and the fireflies. It was very uplifting watching those branches sway and enlightening to see those little bugs light up their butts to show us the way, I can tell you for sure. We knew we would rest one day in the loving arms of the tree roots.

Well, as fate would have it, I counted myself so fortunate to be among millions who had believed in the government’s leadership and preparation for those of us caught up in the national difficulties. When the “Yahweh” crowd got together with other wingnuts, we could see why the police and military warned them not to hoard supplies. I mean, how fair is that? They had it and we didn’t. Soon raids started and all their stuff was confiscated and trucked into the cities for the poor folks who had nothing, finally had something. I felt really bad that they had to wait several weeks for relief, since the government could not give them what they had been getting for several years due to the chaos around the country.

Since the weather is forecast to be really bad this winter, I finally made the decision to walk my family TEN MILES to FEMA camp #291 just outside the city. We heard that they had heat, regular meals, shared bedding, TV video games, and the guards were really nice people. We looked at it like finally; we could relax and not be bothered with all the hell outside the camp. I guess a few in the camp who like to “celebrate” Christmas are the same ones who will be sent on soon to meet their god as a result of their crimes against society. I hope this Jesus is worth all their trouble, because at the end of it, they are sure going to find out just how wrong they were. Oh well, life is tough some times.

In the meantime, we will be thinking of you and wishing you were here with us this “Christmas” time. Under the circumstances, it could be far worse. So until next year, we send greetings, one progressive liberal to another, from our little government resort. Thanks President Obama for looking out for us, and as the old saying goes, sleep tight, and don’t let the bed bugs bite!

See also:

Trooper Greg Evensen's former radio show Voices from the Heartland